What exotic new gizmos are popping up at shopping centers all over the country? I hadn't been in a big mall like Tysons Corner for about 10 years. So, being a patriotic American committed to contributing to the economy, and because visitors from Croatia asked to go there, I launched an exploratory expedition to the big mall in the suburbs, to see how I could help. Just before Christmas, naturally.
First techno-wonder encountered: a helpful robotic at the parking garage to tell you how many spaces are left. Plenty on this weekday! (To those of you who shop regularly, this is probably old hat. Congratulations, you are feeding the economy.)
Peeking into shop windows: oh, what strange and wondrous gadgets immediately caught my eye--and not in a good way!
When does a Christmas ornament make you feel ill? When it features the anti-Santa. Fortunately, one other politician was featured in the same series, somewhat mitigating the sinking feeling in my gut. Still...
Next stop: the Tesla showroom in the middle of the mall--the ultimate high-tech-mobile. (Hmm. The mall? What a strange and wondrous place to sell cars!) And what did my Croatian friends think? They could barely contain their excitement! It turns out the Tesla founder was born Croatian.
Much more down to earth (I.e. less expensive): glitter and glitz for your holiday table. Nothing that requires tech support. Now that Christsmas is past, stock up for next year. Deep discounts.
To round off an amazingly educational tour (by showing me what I've been missing at that American institution, the mall), I gawked at the very latest conveyor-belt/restaurant technology. Who know how many hours that plate of raw fish has traveled this complicated circuit?
As the antidote to my day at the mall, I bid farewell to my foreign friends--who by then were out on the street, mesmerized by the dense conglomeration of tail-lights stuck in rush hour on Route 7--and headed home to cook up some organic greens in my simple and rustic townhouse.
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